Of Things That Have Not Yet Come To Pass
by The Wise Grasshopper
Summary: Befriending a high matinence elf, shaving the eyebrows off of one very drunk Ranger and being kicked out of every known city in Middle Earth is just in a days work for Caroline, Emma, and Riana. This fic is mainly just for laughs! R&R!
1. Default Chapter

**Disclaimer:** We own money... we have a lawyer his name is Alfonzo... we listen to Alfonzo... He tells us this isn't ours... we believe him.  
  
**Author's Note:  
**  
**E.A. Hopkins:** Hi  
  
**The Wise Grasshopper:** Greetings  
  
**The First Real Hermione:** Soup... I mean sup.  
  
**EAH:** This is our first LotR fic.  
  
**TWG:** Well actually...this is my first frick I mean fic... ever  
  
**TFRH:** This story is written in three different POV'S therefore you will have three different authors.  
  
**EAH:** Unfortunately for you I will be your author for The Prologue. Ok, stop crying! I'm not that bad! Just to start you off, the plot revolves around three American teenage girls (yeah I know a nightmare!) who start the day off in summer camp and end the afternoon (not to mention the rest of their lives)...somewhere else! Ok! So I present to you Caroline, Riana, and Emma!!!

* * *

_Three fates... one path...  
  
Three hearts... one voice  
  
Three destinies... one tale_

* * *

"Emma! Emma!" with great effort I opened my eyes only to find I was being woken up by my counselor, Josie.  
  
"What do you want?!?!" I moaned. My voice sounded foreign and disused after a nights sleep. Drafty camp cabins definitely are not good on the vocal cords. Meanwhile an irritated Josie glared menacingly down at my groggy figure.... I knew exactly what she wanted.  
  
"Wake up the others! You're going to be late!" and with that she slammed the cabin door. How typical. We were going to be late for breakfast again. I glanced over at my cabin mates. Ray's sleeping bag was pulled over her head and wrapped about like a cocoon. She let out a groan and glared at me, but stayed incased in her bedding. Ray never was a morning person. Caroline laid sound asleep on her bed, strait as a pole. Her arms were crossed gracefully across her stomach. So serene, so peaceful, so creepy.  
  
"CARE!" I screeched, majorily creeped out by her funeral-like sleeping position.  
  
"MOVE THINE ASS!" Ray in turn shouted from her position on her bed. Caroline's eyes frantically opened and darted around the room. "Well good morning sunshine..." Ray said sarcastically. She scowled at Ray and looked over at the bed next to hers. Our fourth roommate was a scrawny blond who seem to be anorexicly thin but still ate as much as all of our body weights combined. Curse you metabolism! She appeared to be staring off into space but finally snapped out of it.  
  
"Last night... I had a dream that my toes were hanging off the side of the bed... and somebody cut my toes off." Brianna wasn't the brightest crayon in the box. In my opinion...she's got air for brains. I mean how strange can you get? Not to mention random.  
  
"Morning Brianna." Care smiled pleasantly in her direction, ignoring the obscurity of her previous comment. Joy another morning in aspen cabin! With nothing else to screech at each other we had no choice but to follow Josie's orders and get ready to go to breakfast.  
  
A little while later, we were slowly trudging through the depressing hall they dare call a mess ... about 15 minutes late. It didn't take 2 seconds for us to go through the line... everyone was done. Naturally our expert chefs prepared a meal of crap, crap and more crap with side of raw sewage. Mmm! My favorite!  
  
"God this is good!" Brianna stuffed her face with runny eggs. "What's in this?"  
  
"Oh, well its pure cheese!" Caroline smiled evilly at me. Cheese! CHEESE! I hate cheese with a lethal passion. I gag at the very sight of it. Merely by reflex I spit the mouthful of whatever it was right at some kid at the next table. It hit him square in the forehead. I grinned innocently as he glared at me, shocked by the glob of disgusting runny muck dripping down his nose. Ray began to laugh hysterically, gripping to the table for support. Out of nowhere a big glob of runny eggs hit Ray in the eye. She stopped laughing and looked over to see the boy who I had spit eggs at had another glob ready in his hands. She grinned evilly and chucked some hash browns at some pretty-girl loser, who was looking in a small mirror. She let out a shriek and the great food war began.  
  
"Yogurt, duck!" I screamed as a large glob of something skimmed past Caroline's ear. I set a tray in front of me for protection, while Care and Brianna ducked under the table. Ray leapt up and charged toward a table of rowdy food slinging boys in wild abandon; a large glob of oatmeal at hand. Out of nowhere a bagel, cream cheese and all, hit Care in the face. You could tell she was trying to stay calm but she had had enough. She quickly grabbed a something off the table and joined Ray in her battle. I looked over at Brianna who shrugged and together we ran to join our two companions. All of a sudden a shrill whistle blasted. Everyone halted.  
  
"Everyone to the showers in an orderly fashion now!" Head Counselor Ben screamed. "You four," he glared towards Riana, Caroline, Brianna and I. "Stay here." Great! Why did our cabin always get in trouble? After every stupid camper had left the mess hall Ben approached us. "I want you four to clean up this mess you started, understand?" Without waiting for an answer he proceeded to leave.  
  
"This so sucks guys!" Ray groaned picking up a bucket.  
  
"Well you guys did start it!" Brianna glared at us all "Use your common sense guys!"  
  
"Oh, and this is coming from the woman who thinks her toes are going to get cut off in the night." I rolled my eyes sarcastically. God she was stupid. I took us over an hour to meet Ben's cleaning requirements. Relieved of our duties we walked back to the cabin.  
  
"Ahhhhhh!" Ray screamed from the bathroom. After 40 campers showering, the camps hot water supply was running low. Actually it was none existent. I stared over a Care who was struggling to brush her thick curly brown hair. Brianna was throwing her socks against the wall, sticking them in abstract shapes. "I hate this camp's bathrooms!" Ray came in, a towel rapped around her head like a turban. You could tell she was about to go on but was interrupted by Josie.  
  
"You girls need to report in front of the Recreation Room in 5 minutes! Were playing capture the flag!" We let out a collective groan.  
  
"Okay girls," Josie was pacing wildly in front of us "The boys flag is somewhere on this side of the woods but remember, it's illegal to go through the woods during the game, alright? Now then our flag is on this side of the lake by some bushes. The boundary to our land is right here by the lake understood? Cross it and your as good as dead ladies, now move out!"  
  
"Uh, Josie, what do we do?" Care asked sincerely as our fellow team mates exited the fire pit.  
  
"Well, why don't you cause a diversion in the field near the woods?" And with that she ran off to operate her ingenious plan.  
  
"God, you'd think she thought this was the army or something!" Ray glared at Josie's retreating form.  
  
"Come on guys this is war! Boys against girls! Now let's kick some masculine butt!" Care ran off enthusiastically with Brianna in tow.  
  
"Well if you can't beat them join em." I gave Ray a shrug and ran off after them.  
  
"Well this is a waste of time!" the four of us were standing in the middle of a field, surrounded by... nothing.  
  
"I went to Cancun over spring break, and that was a waste of time." Brianna smiled stupidly.  
  
"If I had gone to Cancun instead of my grandparents I would have made sure it WASN"T a waste of time." Ray rolled her eyes, obviously annoyed.  
  
"You stuuuuuupid fat hobbitses!" I croaked in my Gollum voice.  
  
"It burns, it burns us!" Ray joined in.  
  
"We's told yous he was tricksy!" Care in turn croaked.  
  
"Will the three of you shut up? Not everyone is as weird as you. Lord of the Rings? Come on! Can you act normal for like one millisecond? Gawd you're annoying! The only thing more annoying than you is my pet iguana Jebadiah who enjoys eating my earwax. I..." Brianna wasn't able to finish because during her stupid little whining, some twerp came charging at us crying out like Tarzan, and tagged Brianna.  
  
"A prisoner!" He screamed dragging Brianna.  
  
"Don't worry shortie, my friends will save me." Brianna cried out dramatically.  
  
"Sure we will...not!" Ray began to laugh, leaning on me for support. I watched as Care looked worriedly around us.  
  
"Guys we might get stuck with her again if we land in jail! Plus we're standing in an open field."  
  
"She's right let's hide in those woods." I pointed behind me.  
  
"We can't do that! It's off limits!" Care was beginning to smile mischievously.  
  
"Since when do we follow rules?" We grabbed a still laughing Raina ran quickly into the woods. Ray was taller and had longer legs, making her naturally fast. She sped past, leaving us to run frantically in her wake. Care was light on her feet and seemed to skim over the leaf covered forest floor without touching it. I, on the other hand, was trudging slowly behind struggling to keep up.  
  
"Ray, slow down! We're all not athletes here!" Care called out in a singsong voice. We finally caught up to her, and proceeded in a pace that all were capable of maintaining. We were nearing a clearing when I was thrown violently on my back. A white blinding light flashed, and then all I saw was darkness. I was gone... 


	2. Chapter Two

**Disclaimer:** We're not dead, we're not men, we're not British, so leave us alone! J.R.R. Tolkein is NOT in da house. We did not come up with his stuff, dig it?  
  
**The Note of the Grasshopper:** The Grasshopper knows everything but chooses to reveal it in her own sweet time. This chapter should be your enlightening look into my world of Zen and groovyness. I have red shoes. They're chucks. Oh, in case you are wondering this is in Riana point of view. Thank you for your time.  
  
**Chapter Two  
**  
_Ok, holy shiz where am I?  
_  
"You're in a well."  
  
My eyes flashed open wide. In front of me was a tall, gangly, man with an afro, wearing nothing but what looked like a diaper. From my view of the world I realized that I was lying sprawled on the ground, in a position too painful to be considered yoga! My neck, which was twisted upwards, felt strained and sore, like it does on a roller coaster when you're experiencing serious whip lash. With all my strength I stood up cautiously, hoping not the increase the pain of my growing migraine. Brushing the dirt and leaves that seemed to have taken residence in my hair I glanced around. My surroundings consisted of a flat, open field...prairie land.  
  
"Do not worry my child! The Valar will keep you safe from harm! You're home now!" In my newly discovered pain and confusion I had almost forgotten the strange little man whose voice had woken me up in the first place! But sure enough there he sat, his eyes locked on mine. _Oh god I'm hallucinating! Some freak in a diaper can read my mind!  
_  
"Dude. Whattcha smokin'? I'm not in a fricken well." He grinned menacingly, his crooked yellow teeth glistening with saliva. With a wave of his hand his body disintegrated into a small, neat pile of dust. A gust of wind picked up all of what remained of the creepy little man and sent him soaring away from the barren place from which I stood. _Oh god! It's finally happened! I've gone insane!  
_  
Without a second thought I booked it right out of there. I didn't' know where I was going nor did I care! Just so long as I got away from the psycho, disappearing, diaper wearing man with bad dental hygiene! I never knew how far or how long exactly I ran those few days. Time seemed to have disappeared completely. Fatigue did not exist. Sleep nor hunger nor thirst could stop me now! I didn't know what to do or where to go, I just kept running. It wasn't until several days into my trek; I spotted something in the horizon...civilization! _Can I get an AMEN!!!!!  
_  
It seemed to be a city or something...I wasn't quite sure. Hoping not to draw too much attention, I tried to entire the city quietly and blend in with the crowd. Unfortunately for me, I was the only one not dressed like a freak in not so shining armor! _Maybe this is the Renaissance fair! Or maybe they're some freakish cult! That would explain the costumes! So much for the blending in theory!_ Countless people stopped in their tracks to stare at me! I was the most disturbing thing ever! It's like they hadn't seen jeans before! But to my surprise and disgust this was not the case! I glanced down only to see that... "I'M WEARIN A FREAKEN DRESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" A quiet murmur of whispering broke out in the crowd after my outburst.  
  
I looked around frantically for something or someone I'd recognize. Everything was strange, everything was foreign, and yet it was like I had seen it before. Something was oddly familiar...but I couldn't tell what! I ran up to the nearest person to me, some guy with long hair, and grabbed him by the shoulders. "WHERE THE HELL CAN I GET SOME PANTS." Everyone in the courtyard stared back at me with a fearful confused face. _Giving me the deer and headlights look isn't going to help me people! First the insane man and now a bunch of long haired, Renaissance-ish people in a cult! God, why are you punishing me?!!_ Hoping to find someone intelligent in the bunch or at least one that could talk, I walked amongst the crowd. Near the back I spotted a girl who looked not much older than me! Relying on getting another teens understanding I ran over to her and asked "WHAT'S GOING ON?" Not saying a word she merely stared at me like I was crazy. I frantically glanced around for someone who would listen, but I saw no sympathetic face.  
  
Suddenly, I felt a hand firmly grasp my shoulder. I whipped around to see a middle aged man with flowing dark auburn hair and pointy ears. _Hmmmm! Pointy Ears? Jeez! And I thought my genetics sucked! Ah, well maybe some cult women find that a turn on!_ His jaw was set firm in a determined scowl, but his eyes were softened with something else....dare I say pity? _Great! Some cult freak with pointy ears pities me!_ Before I could even ask was going on, a fast mangled mess of sounds exploded from his mouth. I know it seemed like gibberish, but to my amazement...I could understand him! Yes! Yes! I could understand him! Finally someone who talked! He quite clearly had said "Who is it that disrupts the peace in this city?" Somehow I understood, don't know why, but I did. Seeing my shock at his words he continued. "I am Lord Elrond, I see over this city."  
  
Elrond? Elrond! **THE **ELROND!!! Before I knew what had come over me, the same strange language came out of my own mouth. "Am I in Rivendell?" Both of my hands flew up and clasped my mouth. _Ok, if understanding this crack head wasn't freaky enough I spoke the language too._ He nodded slowly. _Holy shiz this is weird. So this explains the cultish, Renaissancelike, pointy eardnes! They were Elves! Real Elves! And I was in Rivendell!  
_  
"Where have you come from my young friend?" Elrond smiled encouragingly; glad to be making some progress with the bumbling idiot in front of him probably!  
  
"Uh... I don't really remember... uh... Oh buddy." I swayed uncontrollably as images flashed through my mind: Caroline, Emma, camp, flying scrambled eggs, the bright light! The past seemed so clear and yet so unreachable at the same time. All in all I knew one thing. "I need to find my friends!" I gasped as I snapped back to reality. Elrond nodded his head lightly, as his brow creased in thought.  
  
"You mean to say there are more of you?" I nodded my head weakly, wishing this would all be over with. Wishing I'd wake up from this nightmare. "I see...you are tired young friend. Follow me and we will get you some food and a bed." I smiled in thanks. It wasn't until the mention of food or sleep that I began to feel the effect of my exhaustion and hunger. I followed him through the twist and turns off the city not paying attention to where the hell I was going, and then again frankly not caring. After what seemed like an eternity we finally approached two large leaf shaped French doors, which swung open to reveal a large bed and a tray full of food. "My young friend, rest your troubled mind! We will discuss this once you have recovered your strength!" He smiled warmly and closed the door leaving me to fend on my own. Slowly I approached the tray of food. Everything on it was...well slightly freaky, but once tasted proven to be delicious. Ravenously I consumed the entire content of the tray within minutes. I then inspected the bed. Down mattress and pillows, large fluffy comforter...yup it was suitable. Not bothering to even take my boots off, I threw myself down on to its cushiony softness and let sleep consume me.  
  
Judging by the sun's positioning, I didn't wake till about mid-day. Not like I minded! It was just the way I had spent Saturdays back home! _Back home? Holly Shiz!!!!!!! I wasn't home...I was in Middle Earth!!!!!_ I felt something heavy fall into the pit of my stomach. During the excitement and confusion of the previous night, I hadn't even thought about the fact that I was...well in some freakish place made up by some old dead British guy!!!!!! In fact, I hadn't really noticed or thought about much at all last night! Carefully I sat up and looked around me. The bed and tray were just as I had left them, but I had failed to notice various other aspects to the room. On the wall adjacent to the door and large couch thingy sat, for company I guess. Then on the next wall sat a large, ornately carved wardrobe. Curious of its contents, I swung my legs over the bed only to be interrupted by a brisk knock. The door swung open revealing a very jittery looking female elf. Mucho creepy timing! It was as if these elves were spying on me, waiting till I got up! Ewwwwwwwwwwww!  
  
"Sorry to interrupt, miss, but I've come to prepare you for an audience with Lord Elrond!" She smiled slightly curtsying. Unsure of how to react I tried a variation of a bow while sitting, which resulted in me falling off the edge of the bed. "Are you alright miss?" The elf maiden asked helping me to my feet. I nodded casually, snapping my fingers.  
  
"Yah...I'm cool! I'm cool! Let's do this thing!" She gave me an uncertain smile, looking extremely uneasy.  
  
"I've prepared a bath for you in the next room. Just go through that door over their!" She pointed to a door next to the wardrobe briskly, and continued about her work. I opened the door to find a large stone tube filled with water waiting for me. After carefully reassuring that no perverted elf was looking in I quickly undressed and scrubbed away all the dirt and mud and leaves that had collected on my skin. Conveniently hanging on a hook on the wall, was some robe like thing that I quickly put on at risk of perverted elves stationing themselves after my inspection.  
  
Hair sopping wet and drenching the back of my robe as it swung behind me, I reentered the main room. My little elf servant/slave/peon whatever she was, was waiting for me. Before I had taken two steps on to the rug, she shoved some clothes in my hands and pushed me back into my bathroom lair! To my great displeasure, the package consisted of some really rather weird looking crap I suppose was meant to be an undergarment of some kind, a dress, and some ultra girly shoes! _Crap! Where are my chucks when I need them!_ After much struggle, I found myself wearing the whole shpeal, but also found that I was unable to button the back! _Shit! Why couldn't I be a freak with double jointed arms, so I can button up this piece of crap dress!_ Finally, due to much distress, I gave up my pointless battle against evil and allowed my little elf servant/slave/peon whatever she was to do it for me! After all, what's a little elf servant/slave/peon whatever she was for?  
  
"There miss!" She gave an exasperated sigh, letting go of the final buttoned button. "We shall do something with that hair! Come here!" She led me over to the couch, to sit down while she scurried about, pinning this and primping that! I felt like a freakin' Barbie doll! Finally after what seemed like hours of torture, she grabbed my wrist and led me to a mirror that was inside the door of the wardrobe. I had to say for once I didn't look that bad! Even if I was wearing a freakin' dress. My hair, still dark from being wet, had been pulled half up and half down, with braids and loops twining together forming a artistic knot on my head. My face had lost it's summer tan, but none the less seemed tan compared to the freakin' albino elf standing next to me. By far the largest shock though was my dress. Not since I was eight had any loser managed to force me into a dress...but I must say, elvish design wasn't half bad! The dress was made deep, dark burgandy though it appeared to be extremely thick and heavy, once put on the cloth was the softest, lightest thing I'd ever worn! Topping off my new elvish goon ensemble was a long silver chain from which a single silver leaf hung. _Shit I look like a freakin' beauty queen! What the hell!_

"Are you ready, miss?" Peon-elf reflection in the mirror smiled at me, as I stared at the disturbing image of perfection that had become me. I nodded my head roughly, causing a few strands of hair to fall out of place. Pleased to have sabatoged my makeover in some way, I turned towards her satisfied.   
  
"Yup! So where's old Elrond-man-dude-guy-person...yah!" My peon frowned slightly, but ignored my last statement and began to walk towards my French doors.  
  
"This way!" She set off at a brisk pace, leaving me to have to jog to catch up. Not even waiting to see if I was behind her, she kept speeding through the city, turning here, going through there leaving me to hurriedly search for her in the various crowds we encountered. Finally I caught up to her in front of a set of doors larger and a grander than my rooms set. "Lord Elrond is in his study." She signaled to the doors in front of us and then disappeared down the hallway. With great force I pushed the heavy doors away and entered Elrond's study.  
  
The Room wasn't exceptionally large, but it wasn't small either. Shelves of books and jars, lined the walls on all four sides. At the far end sat a large desk strewn with papers. Sitting behind it in a high backed chair, was the ruler of Rivendell himself, Elrond!  
  
"Ah! I see you have rested young one!" He smiled looking up from some book he was reading. "Please, come! Sit! We have much to discuss!" He signaled to a chair in front of his desk in which I flopped into in a very unladylike manner, and swung my legs over the arm.  
  
"So...well thanks for the food, room and piece of crap dress chief! Ahh, I'm sorry but I'm kinda broke! I can't give anything!" He raised his hand to silence me.  
  
"Little one it is no trouble at all! Really, Rivendell is honored by your presence!" He smiled awkwardly, finding nothing else to say. I smiled to and began to rap my knuckles on his desk. "So, little one do you have any idea where you came from?" He asked finally, snapping me out of my daydream.  
  
"Wha? Oh no...well yes and no. I remember stuff from before, but I don't know how I got here, and I don't know where I woke up!"  
  
"I see...well from what my guard say, they spotted you at first, several days worth of walking away from our fair city so it certainly wasn't close to here! Do you know how long your journey lasted to Rivendell?" I shook my head.  
  
"A few days I think. I never really stopped, or counted the sun's risings and setting's! I just kept running!" He raised an eyebrow at this last comment!  
  
"You ran for several days without rest, or food or drink?" he questioned disbelievingly. I couldn't help but feel slightly indignant.  
  
"Yah! What? You don't think I could do it buddy? I'll have ya know that I pride my self on my running! And no I don't consider running that weird floating on your toes thing you elves do running. We're not freakin' strawberries so why stay on our toes? Just run! Besides I was kinda motivated on running away from this psycho who..." Elrond was chuckling lightly holding his hand up in defeat!  
  
"Alright, alright! I believe you! That is fairly impressive little one! Not nearly as impressive as an elf's stamina, but it definitely shows signs of the amazing endurance of the men of the North"  
  
"You mean one of those kick ass Ranger dudes?" he nodded smiling. "Yah, they are pretty sweet!"  
  
"Yes, the Dunadain are highly skilled! The only other humans who could have survived those conditions besides you!" He chuckled lightly, standing up to reach a book on a shelf above his head.  
  
"Uh...thanks! Wait! Park it buddy!" He looked severely annoyed by the name but let me continue. "Sorry, I just thought Rangers were only guys."  
  
"Well yes, I suppose so, but if you had on different attire on and one wasn't to look hard at your face or form you could easily pass off as a male!" I glared daggers at him causing him to rethink his last comment. "Of course you obviously aren't a male! Not at all! Unless there is something I don't know about..." I exploded at his bad attempt to be funny.  
  
"HEY DUMBASS! DON'T YOU FREAKING START WITH ME! I HAVE A GREEN BELT IN TAE KWON DO AND I CAN FREAKING KICK YOUR –(the rest has been censored to optimize your reading experience)  
  
"You may try your best young one, but I can have you dead with a wave of my hand..."  
  
"Alright chief. Got the message." I cut in, rolling my eyes.  
  
"And please resist addressing me as buddy, dumb ass, or chief, little one!"  
  
"Sorry sir!" I yelled, saluting. Elrond just glared at me. "And if we're complaining about nicknames now I'd like to ask what all this 'little' and 'young' one business is about! I know I'm not that old but I'm not little either!"  
  
"Ah! Compared to me I fear you are! But perhaps in a mortal lifespan I have misjudged you! How old are you?" He asked politely.  
  
"Fourteen." I declared solemnly, avoiding his gaze, looking back only to see the distinguished elf lord rolling about on the ground laughing. When he finally had calmed himself he returned to his chair, a smile still placed on his face. "Got that out of your system buddy?" He ignored the nickname and nodded.  
  
"Well, considering what you just told me, I believe I shall still refer to you as being young!" He grinned mischievously! _Oh god! What side of this guy was I brining out!_ "But then we all can't address you as such! So...what's your name, young one?"  
  
"Um...I'm...uh...holy crap!!!!! I don't remember!!!!!!" I tried desperately to think back to what my life had been but my mind went blank. Elrond smiled sympathetically.  
  
"Well...here you go! This is your chance to rename yourself. What would you like to be known as?" I stared at him in disbelief. _I got to choose my name! Mucho cool.  
_  
"Alajandra." I stated plainly. "It's Spanish! It sounds cool! It works!" I smiled happily at my new name. "  
  
"Well, after meeting you I think smart ass is quite fitting." He said through a cocky smile. "Anyway what was it? Alleganda?"  
  
"Alajandra-the j is more of an h and you must roll the r!" I corrected, trying to sound superior. "Dig it?" He nodded. And got up from his seat.  
  
"Lady Alajandra is going to be a permanent guest in Rivendell," He told an attendant outside the door. "Have what belongings she had moved to her new room!" I couldn't help but be excited! I was going to live in Rivendell!  
  
"So chief, ya mean it?" He nodded hesitantly, as if reconsidering his generosity. "Sweet!"

We spent the remainder of the afternoon, talking about my arrival, and what was going on in Middle Earth. He endured my insanity and I endured his jerkiness and the world was good...until we ran out of things to talk about. An eerie silence filled the room leaving its inhabitants to twitch uncomfortably in their chairs. Well at least I was uncomfortable! He just stared at me with an 'I hate you so don't try to pull anything look'. "Okay...so...where am I going?" I asked.  
  
"My daughter Arwen will show you to your room." He said and promptly getting up and escorting me to the door. With one quick wave of his hand in farewell, he pushed me out into the hall, and closed the door. Having nothing else to do and nowhere else to go I turned and gazed at the beautiful city I hadn't noticed while I was freaking out the previous day. The architecture really was groovy, and...  
  
"Ally! Alajandra! There you are silly!" _O dear God, just kill me now!!_ I turned to see a girl with long brown hair, half running, and half skipping toward me. My eyes were wide and my mouth dropped in horror. That was the biggest and dumbest smile I had ever seen on somebody's face. This was not...repeat...not the Arwen we knew and love from the books and film! This Arwen was...well...what's the word...creepy!  
  
"Yup...you found me!" I said timidly.  
  
"Hahahahaha!" she snorted "Daddy said you were funny!"  
  
"Oh yeah...Daddy and me...were tight like that..." I trailed off.  
  
"Come on Ally! I'll show you your room" she shrilled. We went running past numerous elves, which all seemed to give me looks of 'I am so sorry'. And that of course made me feel so much better. After climbing three flights of stairs and weaving hallways we finally reached a door at the end of a long corridor. "Haha! You run pretty fast!" she breathed in her high annoying voice.  
  
"Basketball training was last week." I explained. She didn't seem to care.  
  
"Well here you go! This is your room and its extra special, because I decorated the whole thing by myself. Here we go!" She slowly opened the door. "Tada!" Arwen shouted. I looked around in terror. The walls were top to bottom drawings of Aragorn. A faded Gondor flag hung in its corner. The quilt on the bed had 'I love Aragorn' stitched in messy writing along with a blob that I guess remotely resembled his head.  
  
"Dear God help me...I mean it's so pretty!" I falsely smiled.  
  
"I know isn't he...it gorgeous!" she breathed.  
  
I replied "Oh yeah! Took the words right out of my mouth." I turned behind me to see a poster of Aragorn which someone had vandalized by drawing on glasses, big eyebrows and a mustache! I had to say the Groucho Marks look was really going for him.  
  
"Oh, I'm so glad your staying!" She smiled, pulling me into a hug. "I can tell we're going to be the best of friends and..." I heard someone snigger from inside my new Aragorn adorned wardrobe.  
  
"Holy shit! What's in there?" I said. Arwen gasped, I looked over.  
  
"You said a...bad word!" She looked like she was going to cry as she inched to the door. _O my God! Why are you punishing me?  
_  
"I'm sorry...Arwen?" I tried to recover, but she ran out. _Oh well!_ I walked over to the wardrobe and the door swung open. "Whoa buddy!" I yelled as two elves fell out of the wardrobe and landed on top of one another near my feet. Quickly, they picked themselves up and stood, revealing them to be two male versions of Arwen.  
  
"Hey there!" One said smiling brightly.  
  
"This place is so screwed!" I said loudly.  
  
"No not really." The other shrugged. "It's pretty much just her!" I just stared at them, which I must say wasn't too painful. "Oh sorry! We're her brother's Elrohir and he's Elladan."  
  
"We're twins!" the one called Elladan explained.  
  
"No kidding!" I said, rolling my eyes. Can you say, stating the obvious? "I'm-crap...call me Alajandra!"  
  
"I dig it!" Elrohir said.  
  
"Groovy!" Elladan added.  
  
"Wow! Finally someone normal!" I smirked, relieved slightly that someone besides me used 'dig it'. They smiled. "So do you spend most of your time drawing on pictures of ugly people?" I asked.  
  
"Ha! No, that was just to mess with Arwen!" Elrohir said.  
  
"You must be the first girl in the whole city who isn't crazy about Aragorn!" Elladan said.  
  
"Well, I'm surprised...what's there to do in this town? Besides worshiping Aragorn I mean." I asked while leaning out the window.  
  
"Well," Elrohir sighed exasperatedly. "There is a banquet tonight..."  
  
"Hmmm? Sounds like a big deal!" I said.  
  
"Sounds like a big pain in the ass." Elladan replied. I let out a laugh for the first time I'd been there. Not that it was funny, just more of a relief to have met someone halfway sane.  
  
"So I heard you pissed off Dad pretty good!" Elrohir said.  
  
"Yah, I usually have that effect on people." I said. "Apparently I have this 'problem with authority'" I made quotation marks with my hands as I spoke, and apparently they don't make bunny ears here. The twins looked at me like I was crazy for a minute before they bust out laughing. _Ya go ahead and laugh! I'm no stranger to public humiliation!_ I thought to myself.  
  
"Well you can come with us tonight! We'll show you around Rivendell if we can sneak out of dinner!"  
  
"Aight! Sounds groovy!" I smiled. _Ha! And that palm reader said I was going to die alone! Well look at this! I've go two...count them TWO...TWINS who want to sneak out of some snore fest with me! Yes! Cha Ching!  
_  
"Just tell us if you need anything..." They started out the door.  
  
"Hold it! Guys!"  
  
"Yes?" Two heads stuck out of the side of the door speaking in unison.  
  
"One of you...can you get me a pair of pants? I'm not diggin' this whole getting a breeze where therer shouldn't be thing!" I blushed slightly at my request, but knew I would never have the guts to ask again anyway! Next thing I knew I had a pair of pants in my hands and two young elf lords sprinting down the hall from the direction of my room. "THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT BUT THANK YOU!!!" I shouted down the hall. Elrohir and Elladan (who only had what I guess were his boxers on) were sprinting to their room. Elladan turned back and waved until Elrohir frantically spun around and threw him into a room on the left, ran in himself, and slammed the door. Maybe Rivendell wouldn't be that bad!


End file.
